Monday, October 12, 2015

Scan results came in.

Doc said my scan results looked good. The tiny tumor on my liver did not get any bigger. They did shrink in my last scan, three months ago. So this was the best news we could really hope for. I think he had said that the tumor was only a millimeter or so after it shrank. It was a great relief that my current medication was doing its job.

Thanks for everyone's support.

Wednesday, October 7, 2015


Did my CT Scan this morning. Not a big deal. Just no solid food before the procedure and drinking a barium compound. During they injected me with a die that show up in the scans. It causes me to flush and get a metallic taste in my mouth. The tech was real nice. I had her last time I did this.

Now we wait until Friday for the results, anxiously.

Monday, September 21, 2015


When my cancer came back last year I went to a dark place. I just knew my life was over. I had thought that the surgery removed all of the cancer. For almost a year I was in a happy place. Then news of cancer spots on my liver scared the shit out of me. Now I am on chemo-therapy for life.

At first is was horrible. The meds made me crazy. I could not remember things. My wife said it was like I wasn’t there all the time. There were blisters on my feet, numbness in my hands and feet and the sensitivity to cold was the worst, especially since I started all this in January. When I would drive my car, it was like all I could do to keep it on the road. There was not much nausea but I was never very hungry. I slept a lot, too. My infusions were three to four hours every three weeks. Not painful but very boring.

My next CT scan was a surprise. Not only had my tumors not gotten any bigger but had actually shrank. We were elated. The doctor took me off most of the medications that caused the worst side effects. I would just on massive doses of on medication in tablets and one thirty minute infusion every three weeks. But I was still have memory issues and sleeping quite a bit. The doctor took me off of the tablets and left me with the infusion. I have felt a lot more like myself since then.

I had to relearn a lot of things most people take for granted. Showering and falling asleep at night seemed all new to me. I know it is strange but that is how it felt.

I have another CT scan scheduled in October. Fear is creeping up on me again. What if the tumor grows? I might have to go on another type of infusion. The doctor said I might have to get a “port”, a surgically implanted needle with an exposed piece that they can hook to a portable device. I would have to use this device two hours a day and go in every two weeks to get it refilled. This terrifies me.

Tuesday, February 3, 2015

Cancer still sucks and a failure.

Well, the failure was that I would blog my experiences in chemo-therapy. Oh well.

I am just not much of a communicator. Emotions are not shared and I hate pity.

I am half-way through my chemo-therapy and I feel depressed. I hate it. It makes me feel terrible and I hurt all the time. Can't take anything as that would thin my blood too much. And four to five hours of sitting at the doctor's office during my infusion it too much and painful too. The cold sensitivity lasted much longer this time. I hope it goes away soon.

Cannot wait to be done. One way or the other.